Most of you reading this, like myself, went to schools like William & Mary… Middlebury… the Ivys… three-syllable, one-word liberal arts schools in Ohio… in other words, colleges with little-to-no athletic muscle. So, when March Madness rolls around, we have precious little vested interest — aside, perhaps, from rooting against Duke.
But not me, dawgs. Here’s where I pull a little trump card out of the back pocket of my Carhartts and make you look stupid. Because I have… a SECRET ALMA MATER. And that bitch is in the Great Eight*.
* Note: the national media uses a different catchphrase for the remaining eight teams in the NCAA’s… an oh-so-clever alliterative bridge between “Sweet Sixteen” and “Final Four,” which I refuse to say/type.
In 1994, I did a semester study-abroad program in Melbourne. It might be more accurately described as simply an “abroad program,” because I took the “study” straight out of it. To wit, my marks that term:
Computer Science: F
Indonesian 101: F
Australian Politics: C+
Some other course: F
Let’s focus on the positives people, because that bright, shining C+ translated back home to not one, not two, but THREE hours of credit at William & Mary. Those credits came all the way from Indianapolis, IN, and the school which ran my abroad program. That school: Butler University.
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Two Idol thoughts:
(1) The choreography of the Bottom Three Reveal was shockingly awkward. It was shawkward. Let me paraphrase Seacrest for those of you who missed it:
Lee and Casey, you two both stand up. Okay, now Paige and Tim, why don’t both of you stand up as well. Judges, out of these second two I just made stand up, which deserves to go? Okay… yeah… well, America has voted, and… Paige, you are in the bottom three. And Tim, you are also in the bottom three. Now, I’m going to toss it to a commercial while Lee and Casey still stand there.
(2) I fast-forwarded through most of the results show, but for some reason watched the duet featuring the Jonas Brother. Did you hear the girls screaming? Amazing. The South Park episode featuring them (in which all the girls at their show “start feeling tingly” and rub their little bodies silly against the arena seats) was dead-on. I think when Joe Jonas is older, perhaps as young as 37, he will look back at this time in his life and have serious second thoughts about choosing celibacy.